Wish Ronquillo Peacocke (00:00.13)
We are made up of stories. I think we tend to want to be like a resolved chapter each time. But that's quite unrealistic. We have a lot of unresolved, unclosed, discontinued stories where we just don't know their conclusions, especially with relationships far and wide. How does one cope without closures? Let's talk about this.
Welcome to Human Thesaurus Presents Epitome Anatomy. My name is Wish, a retired tech operator, Indie Author, Cat Mom, and a self-aware life explorer.
Epitome Anatomy is an opinion piece on the power of words and their ethos that I extracted from this life. Ready for the epitome of closure? Let's go!
Wish Ronquillo Peacocke (01:08.312)
Our keyword is closure. According to dictionary.com, closure is simply an end or conclusion. To further enhance the meaning of this episode, closure is (A) the resolution of a significant event or relationship in a person's life. To (B) a sense of contentment experienced after such a resolution.
The word closure traces back to the late Latin clausura meaning to lock, fortress or a closing, which derives from the past principle of the Latin verb claudere meaning to close. It entered Middle English via Old French in the late fourteenth century, initially describing a physical barrier, fence or enclosure.
Wish Ronquillo Peacocke (02:10.373)
there are people in our lives that made an impact. It doesn't matter whether it's good or bad, but sometimes these encounters or these relationship that ended haunts us to what ifs. Sometimes we never think about this all the time. It just comes and goes. You know, sometimes our minds wander and you just think,
I wonder what happened to X and and Y and Z. There's always curiosity. And beyond that curiosity, there are some incidents with people in our lives in the past or even in present that were unresolved. It's sometimes hard to get over or get past that situation because there are lots of
Things that were unsaid, or there were actions that were not even undone, but just not being pursued. So there's something that sometimes stops us from moving forward because we can't move on from the past. I have a few of these people, but full disclosure, thankfully, I think I'm at this point that.
There are some of these people that I know and I've accepted that I will never get a closure with, and that's fine. At least it's not haunting me anymore. It's more about curiosity. Number one is those who haunt me, but at least it doesn't take over my life, or it doesn't mean that I I don't get over it, but it's really more of
It was such a scary thing and it wasn't fully explained to me what they did and it just kinda feels unsettling or cringy every time I think about it. Those people never get to explain to me what what happened there or what they did to me or why what they didn't do to resolve probably our issues at that time.
Wish Ronquillo Peacocke (04:29.688)
There are a few of those people who taught me a lot even without having a closure with them or resolving my conflicts with them. They taught me these unresolved events with these particular people who taught me and haunt me, they're normally bad to me. They normally did something really horrible to me.
I'm not even playing a victim here, but sometimes those non closures is really more for me to just make peace with it and resolve it for myself. You know, sometimes you will just wish that they can explain why they did what they did, but doesn't matter to me. What mattered to me, I wanted to move forward. I concluded those moments that I will never ever want to be like them.
I will never ever want to be in their shoes. I will never be those people who did horrible things to me. And that's more than enough for me to move on. Like they're horrible. I'm not even interested to understand or get their explanation. And also I have those people that I never got in a closure because I never really cared.
Like, okay, that was the end of it. There's no explanation, it or it was unresolved. And I think there are some things in life that it's better to just move on without completing the journey. an abandoned journey. What happens here is when you have something unresolved and you're able to move on, is you have to kind of pat yourself in the back because you're trying to be a bigger person.
Because I think mostly when we're trying or when we kind of think that we wanted a closure out of something, it's because we give the power to the situation or to that person to resolve what that person or what that situation made us feel. Those explanations, yes, they're very, very helpful if life is that perfect that you can close each situation, each chapter, each hardship.
Wish Ronquillo Peacocke (06:51.41)
age challenges in your life but that's not reality. But I think there are a portion, lighthearted portion about this, right? Like when we think of I I wonder, I always wonder why. I think it's also because we are very curious creatures and there's a certain discernment, especially when we think about our pasts.
every time we move on to different chapters or we mature, we kind of look back and ask ourselves or what happened there and what happened to that person. It's either there are remnants of love because, you know, you have relationships and interactions with these people and it's unresolved. It it's it's quite hard. It's quite hard. Yeah, you know, being curious beings and also there are some
Closures that I think is so disturbing that you cannot find peace at all moving forward. The only way you can move forward with some of these hard, unresolved things is to find other reasons to live, find other reasons to function. It goes back to striking balances to advocate for yourself.
To live, to live fully away from the shackles of other people who did things to you. If that makes sense. The hardest closure as well is something that you're aware that you cannot get. For example, I I see this a lot with a lot of people. Things that were unsaid. Especially when that person is gone. If that
person passed away and there were a lot of unresolved things or I didn't get to say I love you that day and and suddenly they're gone. That is hard. That must have been hard because that will disturb you for the rest of your life. And then we develop coping mechanisms again just to move on. It's quite a tricky part. It's this word
Wish Ronquillo Peacocke (09:13.728)
I think it's very loaded as as much as the other keywords that I've already s talked about with you here. Where should you draw the line for closure with this magnanimous complex reasons of different unresolved things? There are a few things that at least I live by, and again I'm not
Preaching and I'm not trying to coach you. It's just sharing with you what I see, what I observe. We have to admit it to ourselves. Not everything, every single situation is something that we're able to close clean cut. There are lots of complexities in life. The core of it is us and also the core of it is us, but the world does not evolve around us. And that's quite humbling.
Once you understand that, a lot of factors are not just based on yourself. There are so many moving parts in life that a lot of things are beyond your control. So yeah, where do you draw the line? I think sometimes it's better not to have the closure. It's all about letting go. There are some things that are better left unsaid. It's because it's probably going to stain us or wound us worst.
When you get it, and also it's something that perhaps again beyond our control, perhaps it's it's better to just let it go. It's okay not to have an explanation if it doesn't affect you in the longer run. And it's okay as well to not get the answer because there's no way of getting it. And sometimes it's okay as well that.
You just find peace for where it is and you just need it to reflect on where you're at in life. And sometimes you know when when we're in the thick of things, it seems like a big deal. But time heals all wounds. What sometimes when we move on with life and look
Wish Ronquillo Peacocke (11:25.58)
back into something that we badly wanted closure for and it was so unresolved, but apparently it doesn't matter. It was just a small matter and it's not really a big deal moving on. You know, sometimes it's unrealistic to find the closure. So one of the biggest things for that is self-forgiveness. It's like okay, I forgive myself for behaving that way at that time and not able to apologize or find the reasons why.
And that's more than enough. self-awareness is quite a practice. It's a long-term commitment to yourself to do. And it's quite rewarding if you do so because you can control what you can control, which is yourself. And really, like these closures sometimes just really takes time. Like what I said, it may be not a big deal in the longer run. And it just seems to be like
Right now and sometimes getting it and not getting it, I always bank it till things happen for a reason. I remember when my father was alive and I was going through a very huge breakup, I kept on asking him why why why it was really painful and he simply told me I still remember it up to this day. He said maybe you will never know why.
Or maybe one day you will. Respect time. Whatever happens by then, you will understand why. Maybe not now, and it's okay. I took that to heart and before you know it, after a few years, it did take some time. Sometimes, at least in this situation, my closure did not even come from.
My ex. It came from myself. I understood better because I grew up better. I matured. I learned more things. One day I just stopped in a street and I was like, that's my why. So I close that chapter by myself. But I thank my dad up in heaven for giving me that piece of wisdom to just leave it to time.
Wish Ronquillo Peacocke (13:54.264)
How important is having a closure for you? What do you usually do for your unresolved circumstances? Please comment. I'd love to hear from you. I have a direct message via text or voicemail on each of my episode summary. It's just on top. So please check it out. Until next time. Ciao.
Wish Ronquillo Peacocke (14:29.038)
Comment, like, subscribe, and share wherever you listen to podcasts. You can also visit humanthesaurus.co. Epitome Anatomy is produced by me and Jeremiah Ronquillo. Music by Ketsa UK All Rights Reserved by Wishblizz Media. Thank you, and see you in the next episode.
